Beth

How You'll Know You Are A Woman At Last!

Tue, 11 Dec 2007 17:19:37 GMT

I just wrote this, I am going to make a children's book for adults only and this is what it will be.. illustrations to come in the upcoming months.
I'll probably edit it more and make things rhyme more too, but you get the gist of it.
What is with the word "gist?" Am I spelling that right? I will Wikipedia it after this.

It is weird to feel things oozing out of you like a plant. That is one of the feelings of being a woman. Honey. Honey - Hunny someday sticky things will flow out of your cunt and that is how you'll know that you are a woman at last!
You probably won't ever like it but sometimes it will be funny. It will be funny with other women friends when no men are around (sometimes they will be around, it will still be funny for you, but they will not laugh, they'll probably frown). Another funny time might be with you and your comfortable lover and then even if it is a man, he can laugh too because it would be your lover who gave your your ooze in that case!
Sometimes along with some ooze and some pain a whole new person might come out of you, that must be really weird!
The ooze is annoying yes, but it is helpful too you see, you'll save lots of money on home pregnancy tests, go ahead and do it, your time ticking insides will let you know the rest!
Don't be ashamed of your delicious secretions, you and your lover will love them! Sometimes after practically bathing in them (if you're doing it right) you can even ask your lover to drink the rest of them up!
Its good and its bad yes I know, but at least it is interesting and you don't have an appendage that grows!

Sun, 28 Oct 2007 21:52:24 GMT

I might start actually using this thing again becasue:
1. I'm a sellout and now have ads on my personal page so that I can easily post pictures places
2. I can post pictures places
3. Give myself the feeling that I am creating something while wasting my time at the computer

I made this a couple months ago, it needs to be fired. It isn't hollow though so the artists I know with kilns are scared to fire it because it might explode. Although I have reassured them that I really don't think there are any air bubbles in it at all, there is no way to confirm this so I might not be able to ever have it fired and glazed.

In other news, I deleted my Myspace account. I don't like being updated about peoples dumb plans and relationship status or whatever. If I don't hear from somebody in the future because they couldn't find me on Myspace, then I don't want to talk to them anyway.

Thu, 13 Sep 2007 15:02:00 GMT

My Monologue

Reclaiming "Slut."
Expressive sexuality
With an ability
To make myself
Feel good.
Comfortably seductive vibes
May frighten some
But my skin
Feels
Electrical.

Reclaiming "Skirt."
Flowering smoothness caresses
My silk-laden legs,
I feel beautiful
For me.
This broken water
From your
Drop of glass
Has melted
Back
Together.

_____

Coffee and My Woman

Connecting and pulling in
It's perfect temperature
As I would with
Sara's warm cunt.
You both get me
So high with your
Stimulating creaminess
I like it rich and sweet
And embrace
Distinct
New
Flavors.

_____

Blue Collared Students
Appear in a Sun
Hard working rays
In this deafening hut.

_____

The Cracked remains
Smooth over from the outside
Slowly connecting
Some bites
More quickly than others
I sense a full recuperation
This time
It may be a first
Peace for
Every
Part.

pssst..

Tue, 07 Jun 2005 13:37:43 GMT

its my birthday :)

volume control

Tue, 17 May 2005 02:52:49 GMT

a pleasurable assault

BURRITO LOCKDOWN!!!

Tue, 03 May 2005 19:58:05 GMT

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/burrito_lockdown;_ylt=AiVHQ_3QiqnAepCQHwGzuPKs0NUE;_ylu=X3oDMTA2bm5xNHVjBHNlYwNtcA--

dead1y rhythm: what is this
BethG6785: BURRITO LOCKDOWN!!!
dead1y rhythm: that is retarded
dead1y rhythm: why do you read things like that
BethG6785: because thats the most amazing thing ever
BethG6785: there was a burrito lockdown in america this week joe
BethG6785: this is where we live
BethG6785: haha
BethG6785: its so sadly amazing
dead1y rhythm: thats true

mhmhmhhhmmm

Tue, 26 Apr 2005 06:42:00 GMT

"Wrapping up his investigation into Saddam Hussein's purported arsenal, the CIA's top weapons hunter in Iraq said his search for weapons of mass destruction "has been exhausted" without finding any."

no shit, dude.

http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/ap/20050426/ap_on_re_mi_ea/iraq_weapons_hunt

last news update today, i SWEAR!

Thu, 14 Apr 2005 16:06:22 GMT

"As I stated in January, we face a great moral challenge to make sure opportunity is an open door through which every citizen can pass — not a revolving door which turns for some and doesn't budge for others," he said.

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=519&ncid=519&e=21&u=/ap/20050414/ap_on_re_us/civil_unions_oregon

fooooor serious.

also: pigs swimming

"Pigs compete swimming race at Pig Olympics Thursday April 14, 2005 in Shanghai, China. The pigs, a midget species from Thailand, begin training soon after birth and can begin performing professionally from about one year of age according to local media." (AP Photo/Eugene Hoshiko)

Thu, 14 Apr 2005 13:05:19 GMT

our country is so ridiculously embarrassing sometimes, its almost funny

http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/ap/20050414/ap_on_re_us/air_travelers_lighters

almost.

Tue, 12 Apr 2005 18:32:30 GMT

i got in a fight with one of my professors today
it made me yell and get angry
but then it made me laugh because it was the same professor that told us all that global warming didnt exist

fucking moron.

"...hit them on the head, as he did when he was a child."

Mon, 11 Apr 2005 17:02:58 GMT

"Animal welfare groups say bludgeoning cane toads is inhumane, and the best way to kill them is to freeze them."

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=590&ncid=721&e=12&u=/ap/20050411/ap_on_re_au_an/australia_toxic_toads

yes!

Sat, 09 Apr 2005 15:06:56 GMT

The white-haired, bespectacled granny was unrepentant, and said she would keep cooking with pot.

"I had it this morning in my scrambled eggs and I'll have it again for lunch. I'm not giving it up," she told Channel 4 News.

Tabram has become a symbol for the legalise marijuana campaign. On her website, www.grandma-eats-cannabis.com, she promises soon to provide free recipes, as well as tea towels and mugs for sale.

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=857&ncid=757&e=10&u=/nm/20050408/od_uk_nm/oukoe_odd_britain_crime

KILL THEM ALL!

Sat, 09 Apr 2005 04:58:16 GMT

http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/ap/20050408/ap_on_re_us/wendy_s_finger

no shit.

yes

Fri, 08 Apr 2005 14:05:21 GMT

most hilarious candy:

[and also interesting modification]

Sun, 27 Mar 2005 16:34:58 GMT

i do believe in chocolate

FUND RAISER!!!!

Thu, 17 Mar 2005 20:08:31 GMT

ATTN: FRIENDS OF JACOB W. SULLIVAN

It has recently come to my attention that our dear friend Jake may not be able to afford a ticket to see The Mars Volta because the state of Rhode Island thinks that he should give it a bunch of money for parking in a spot which was most likely horribly marked in the first place. Parking tickets suck, The Mars Volta is fabulous AND one of Jake's favorite bands [I would assume] so YOU should donate a couple bucks for his ticket. Throw a couple bones his way for this amazingly good cause and get yourself a ticket too because it is going to be an incredible show.

Thank you in advance
becasue I know you'll do the right thing.

07march2005

Mon, 07 Mar 2005 17:15:36 GMT

i think at this time next year ill be living in california or maybe seattle
national student exchange.
i feel like if i say something publicly about it ill be better at making myself do it
so here ya go, a public entry.

de.loused

Thu, 03 Mar 2005 15:36:00 GMT

"In 1990, a 17 1/2-pound lobster named Mimi died just days after being flown to a restaurant in Detroit. Last year, a 14-pound lobster named Hercules that was rescued by a Washington state middle school class died before it could be released off the coast of Maine."

Tue, 22 Feb 2005 05:26:05 GMT

i think ill move to pakistan...

"In 2002, another village council near Multan ordered a woman gang-raped as punishment for her brother's sexual relations with another woman."

hooray for hallmark!

Tue, 15 Feb 2005 01:14:04 GMT

in first grade i wrote
"i hate you"
on a valentine that i gave to a girl in my class.

she cried
i was 'spoken to'

i still think its lame.

Green Day has FOUR members

Mon, 14 Feb 2005 18:45:14 GMT

"By the way, what's up with trios that expand to quartets onstage but pretend the other member doesn't exist? At least the camera operators didn't completely ignore the mysterious fourth member on guitar."

By DAVID BAUDER, Associated Press Writer

In true punk rock fashion, Green Day tested the censors at the Grammy Awards on Sunday — and the censors were ready. The Bay Area rockers, on a career high with their "American Idiot" album, added a shot of rock 'n' roll adrenaline by performing the title cut. The disc won the Grammy for best rock album.

The song includes a prominent obscenity in one of the lyrics, but the censors were plainly prepared and neatly excised the word. They couldn't delete, however, singer Billie Joe Armstrong's pointed political reference to not wanting to be part of a redneck agenda.

Green Day was energetic and confident, a band that's grown up but hasn't left its punk roots behind: witness the smoothly practiced leap and landing from the riser by drummer Tre Cool. And Armstrong was a live wire.

By the way, what's up with trios that expand to quartets onstage but pretend the other member doesn't exist? At least the camera operators didn't completely ignore the mysterious fourth member on guitar.

...had that same question a few months ago when i saw them play.

a l w a y s yesmaybeno

Fri, 11 Feb 2005 17:48:25 GMT

"We haven't made it to Oz yet," Behrenfeld said, who recently left NASA. "But today we are announcing we have found the Yellow Brick Road."

that guy MUST be awesome.

the news is awesome.

Thu, 10 Feb 2005 05:49:40 GMT

"THE CASE: A couple sued a fertility clinic for "wrongful death" because one of their embryos was not preserved. A judge ruled that the case could proceed, basically giving a testtube embryo the status of a person."

a joke... right?

"Aguilar said that the drug gangs had also intimidated some Indian communities into dropping traditional Holy Week Catholic Church rites to worship Jesus Malverde, the patron saint of the drug runners."

hahahahah

freedom fries are retarded

Sat, 05 Feb 2005 18:52:01 GMT

i want a copy of this.

i have a girl crush and its on a political figure.

Fri, 04 Feb 2005 16:59:59 GMT

This woman, Yulia Timoshenko, was just voted in as Prime Minister in the Ukrainian.
How sick is that?! Check this woman out!
mad pimp shoes, hair up in some crazy awesome braid, lace on the bottom half of her sheer sleeves, high coller but a wicked tight body!
seriously, check the legs.
this woman is sexy.

just imagine what she looks like on a date.

how awesome would that be if Laura Bush showed up at the next big public political even dressed like that?